Hi! My name is Mykalee and I am a self-help addict. I consume life hacks, tips and methods from sun up to sun down. I haven’t read a fictional book in two years and I barely watch videos for pure entertainment. I filtered self improvement content from the bullshit ones in the hopes of training my mind to be positive.
But how many MindBodyGreen articles I must read in order to get to the next spiritual level, flush toxins, and create a helluva lot more “abundance” in my biweekly paycheck?
Nothing is new under the sun. I know this.
But I consume lifestyle videos as if Infinite Waters will tell me something, my intuition already didn’t. When I wasn’t feeling the way I feel I should feel (say that 3 x fast), I automatically assume that my life plan, goals, and actions aren’t working. So I must go back to the drawing board and do more research.
This time, my research gave me a huge head ache and exhaustion. Which led me to consume everything BUT self-help for one night. I felt so good that I did it again for the next few days.
Due to the lack of self- help consumption, I had no choice but to be present. Being present allowed me to hear my intuition louder. Its voice was drowned out by the life tips and suggestions of strangers. Opinions of people who do not live in this body, who do not know my soul.
“It could all be so simple, but you rather make it hard” – Lauryn Hill
That’s probably what my intuition thinks of my conscious mind. When I have a problem, it sends solutions so simple I automatically turn it down and google something more complex. However, it’s always right and I tend to use its game plan in the end.
Am I not confident in myself and my ability to lead me to my dreams and goals?
Am I validating the strong suggestions of others instead of my own god given, scientifically proven inner GPS?
Am I telling myself I have a broken GPS?
Obviously, there’s some inner work to be done.
” I believe one of the most valuable gifts you give yourself is time – taking time to be more fully present” – Oprah Winfrey
Other than the revelation that I need to trust myself to lead more often, I also realized that the constant consumption of self-help took me away from the present.
Constantly reading about workout plans, travel hacks, or budgeting methods, made me think about how my “future” self will benefit from this information. A lot of the positive actions I want to implement depends on money and time I currently don’t have.
And while I daydream about my “future” life, my present rots with mindless negative habits which drives me further from my “ideal” self. I constantly live in a future that doesn’t exist because daydreaming a dope life helps me escape my own. And that shit is for the birds.
The future doesn’t exist? And the lie detector determined that I was telling the truth!
No. The future doesn’t exist. It’s a figment of our imagination (#EckhartTaughtMe).
Have you ever been in the future? Like, for real. Have you ever traveled to the future? You can plan a March vacation in January but the only way you can experience that vacation is when March is your present time. And just like you can plan your vacation, you can your goal deadlines in the “future”. But the only thing is really true is the present.
I’d love to have a “future” where my health is on 100, my edges are flourishing, my bank account got bank accounts, my passport got some creases, and my alchemy is off the charts! I really believe it can happen. ONLY if I focus on my present actions.
Trust me when I say, I’m not going to give up my goals. I’ve been a goal setter and a go-getter since my days in the womb.
But I think. Nah. I know I’ve been doing this the wrong way.
When I workout, I think about the amazing clothes, clear skin, and toned body I’m gonna have in the “future” instead of being present in my body. Being present in my body is feeling the sweat cooling my body down, the blood pumping in my heart, the strength of my limbs, and the clarity in my mind.
Yes, right now.
Self-help recovery is in effect.
I’m clearing out the excess noise, turning up the volume of my intuition and improving my life in the present.