I’m not a 4b or a 4c. I’m neither a 3a or 3b. I have a mixture of African naps laced with my grandmother’s Arawak tresses. My hair doesn’t curl, coil,or zigzag. It defies the laws of the natural hair community and was the perfect formula for the long dreadlocks I had two years ago.
When I get frustrated with my loose hair, I often regret making the spontaneous big chop. However, this new hair journey has taught me more in two years than my locs did in six.
It was on a Saturday in November when all the weight of my problems fell on the salon floor. Some believe that one’s hair can hold a lot of good and bad energy. I resonate with that philosophy for I had my locs during the crazy years of my teen life. All those memories were overwhelming and it was time for a fresh start.
I went back to school the following Monday feeling like an alien. People kept staring and asking why I would cut my beautiful hair. All of a sudden it dawned on me, did they see Mykalee or a girl who had great hair? Either way, I felt naked internally. But it forced me to not hide under my appearance and express myself fully.
As someone who endured the “ugly stage” of dreadlocks with no problem, letting my hair grow was an emotional struggle for me. Sometimes, it may be too short or too long for a certain style. There are times where I wanted to cut it all over again. But eventually, I came to appreciate the process and the small milestones my hair reached. It reminded me that the best changes are the ones that happen slowly.
No matter how much hair blogs I read or Vloggers I watch, my hair doesn’t cooperate with their methods. I used to wish that my hair bounced and curled like others, but I grew to appreciate the thick and simple hair I have. It has led me to accept my body, my skills, and my environment. But most importantly, acceptance has brought me to the present moment.
When I think about what I’ve learned so far, my frustrations with my hair dissolves. Who knew that a new do could not only update your look but your perspective on life as well.